i saw your Butt ad in Butt. for what it's worth from a hetero like myself, you seemed like the most charming & eligible of the bachelors. have you had any positive reponses? i have a couple of friends in London who might have a couple of friends, if not. or with a last name like yours, it can't be far away.
i hear your pain about creative bleakocity. i used to be creative in London, and eventually ended up working (in the not paid sense) for Butt in Amsterdam. whatever creative field you're in, i'm sure Jop & Gert have London friends in it. since they like you, maybe you could ask them if they could set you up with a couple of people to do work experience / part-time etc. with, amongst their other match-making? and from that you might meet a fellow co-worker's eyes across a crowded office / art gallery / photo shoot? just an idea.
ps: good beard btw.